


A New Life

by few (Jennifew)



Category: High School Musical (Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-09-22
Updated: 2009-09-22
Packaged: 2018-01-25 10:57:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1646171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jennifew/pseuds/few
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Six months after reconnecting with Ryan, Chad re-evaluates his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A New Life

**Author's Note:**

> Sequel to [A New Chance](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5043).

"...and then Coach suspended McCall for three weeks, which has made practices painful since everyone knows without him we don't stand a chance of winning..."

"Uh-huh." As usual, Chad had tuned out when Troy started going on about the third-rate basketball team he'd ended up as a junior assistant coach for. As long as he remembered to make vague noises once in a while, Troy never caught on to the fact that he wasn't really listening.

He'd put the phone on speaker just in case Troy started talking about something interesting, but most of his attention was focused on making travel arrangements for his upcoming trip to New York. Apparently he'd done better on that first trip than he'd thought, because his company began sending him back on nearly a monthly basis.

He didn't mind at all. He and Ryan had kept in touch as they'd promised, and they'd made an effort to get together each time he'd been in the city, no matter how pressed they were for time. Luckily it looked like this trip would be one where he could take advantage of the airlines' crazy pricing structure to stay a couple of extra days in the name of saving on airfare.

"...so I tried to suggest some of the drills we used to do back at East, but they wouldn't listen to me..."

"That sucks." Ooh, it looked like he could return Monday evening for the same price as Sunday, and since it was a long weekend, he didn't have to be back in Albuquerque until Tuesday. Ryan didn't have a show on Mondays, so for once they'd be able to spend almost a full day together. Awesome. Quickly Chad purchased the ticket, and his travel plans were complete.

"Hey, Troy," he interrupted, "it was good to hear from you, but I've got a meeting to run to. Talk to you later?"

"Oh. Yeah. Sure, man. Later."

Once Troy had hung up, Chad checked his watch. He actually did have a meeting, but not for another half hour. Ryan shouldn't be working yet, so he went ahead and called him.

"Chad! Hi!" He could hear the smile in Ryan's voice, which prompted a smile of his own.

"Hey, Ry. Got a minute?"

"Of course. What's up?"

"Just wanted to let you know I'll be going back out there the Wednesday before Memorial Day."

"How long can you stay this time?"

"The whole weekend. I don't have to leave until Monday evening," Chad told him.

"I was hoping you'd say that."

Chad laughed. "Glad to hear it."

"I'll stock up on junk food for you," Ryan promised.

"You know me so well." Just then Chad's desk phone rang. He groaned. "I've gotta go--work call coming in. Call me when you get home tonight?"

"You bet," Ryan agreed before ordering Chad back to work and ending the call.

The one good thing about living so far away was that the time difference meant it was still relatively early for Chad when Ryan got done with evening performances; in fact, that was often the most mutually convenient time for them to talk. If they'd been in the same time zone their schedules would have clashed completely most of the time.

Work kept Chad busy the rest of the day, but as usual after talking to Ryan he'd been in an unusually good mood. A few of his co-workers even commented on it, but Chad didn't try to explain. The truth was, he didn't know how.

Sure, everyone in the office probably knew he was gay by now--there were only a few people he'd said anything to, mostly correcting mistaken assumptions, but he'd never bothered asking them to keep quiet about it. That wasn't the problem. No, the problem was that he didn't know how to describe Ryan.

"Friend" was true, but incomplete. "Boyfriend", on the other hand, felt equally inaccurate as far as Chad could tell. After some initial awkwardness the first night of Chad's second trip to New York, when neither was sure if the other wanted to pick up where they'd left off, they'd easily fallen into bed again when he visited, but they'd never talked about it. Even after Ryan had pointed out that it was silly for Chad's company to keep paying for hotel rooms when more often than not he spent the night at Ryan's, Chad had no idea how Ryan thought of them. It seemed safest to assume they were just friends with benefits, given that for all he knew Ryan was seeing other guys in between Chad's visits. (Chad wasn't, but he hadn't mentioned that to Ryan, either. It wasn't like it had been a conscious decision; he'd just...stopped dating. The opportunity arose rarely enough now that he lived in Albuquerque that he hadn't even noticed for a couple of months. That didn't mean Ryan wasn't dating, however--though Chad was confident that any dating he might be doing was casual. Ryan would not keep sleeping with him if he were in an actual relationship.)

Chad generally tried not to think about it, and he was okay with the uncertainty most of the time. It might have mattered more if they weren't so far apart, but they were, and most of their interaction was over the phone, where it really didn't matter. When he was in New York he preferred to enjoy the time he spent actually with Ryan, in bed or out, rather than trying to start what could only be an uncomfortable conversation that wasn't really necessary. They were just fine as they were, as long as no one asked Chad to describe their relationship.

Thanks to an unusually busy time at work, the following days passed more quickly than Chad expected; before he knew it he was putting together the presentation he'd be giving in New York. He'd gotten over the nervousness he had felt the first time he'd been sent to Headquarters, but he still put just as much effort into preparing for these meetings, not wanting to risk having the trips be re-assigned to someone else. Luckily he had plenty of time to devote to it despite the increased workload, given that he didn't have much of a life. He still visited his parents a couple of times a month, but most of his friends had left Albuquerque. Now that he'd stopped trying to meet men, he found he didn't bother going out much, either, leaving his evenings free. Not exactly how he'd pictured his life at this point, but it could be worse.

Maybe it was time to consider looking for work elsewhere. He'd ended up here back when his father was sick and he'd needed a job in Albuquerque fast, and couldn't afford to be picky. He had grown used to it, and the semi-regular free trips to New York had turned out to be an unexpected benefit, but this wasn't really where he wanted to be in another ten years.

The thought was still on his mind when he settled comfortably on Ryan's couch a few days later. Chad took the beer Ryan offered, grateful that he'd started keeping some around. Chad had to be up too early in the morning to risk coffee at this hour, but after the long flight on top of a busy morning at the office, he felt he deserved a single beer to help him relax. Ryan joined him with a mug of tea.

"All right, spill."

"Huh?"

"You've been distracted since you got here," Ryan clarified. "What's up?"

"Oh, um, nothing, really. It's just...."

"Hmm?"

"Well, I've been thinking that maybe I should look into a career change."

"Things not going well at work?"

"No, everything's fine, I just...well, I never exactly dreamed of sitting behind a desk all day, you know? I'd ask how I ended up in this situation, except I already know how. But the reasons don't exist anymore, and yet...I'm still here. Or, rather, I'm there, stuck in Albuquerque when I could be somewhere more comfortable, like back in the Bay Area."

"Is that where you'd want to move, if you left New Mexico?" Ryan asked tentatively. "San Francisco?"

Chad shrugged. "Not necessarily. But I do miss living somewhere where no one gave me a second look if I was out with a guy."

Ryan smiled understandingly. "Yeah, New York's great that way, too."

"So I've noticed."

"Okay, well, if you're sick of your job, what would you like to do instead?"

"I have no idea, aside from 'not this'," Chad admitted. "In my defense, I really haven't been thinking about it very long."

"In that case, why don't you let your subconscious work on the problem for a couple of days and we'll discuss it this weekend? This isn't something to decide in a hurry, and it's getting late. I know you need to be up early tomorrow."

Chad glanced at his watch and groaned. "You mean today. And you're right, I should try and get some sleep."

The first couple of times he'd spent the night here during the week, Chad had offered to sleep on the couch so as not to disturb Ryan in the morning, but Ryan had insisted that was unnecessary. Given that he was always dead to the world when Chad left, Chad soon gave up arguing. The couch was comfortable, but he'd be a fool to insist on sleeping alone when he didn't have to. Even on nights like tonight, when there wasn't time for anything else and it was still early by his usual standards, Ryan went to bed at the same time Chad did. He was probably just being polite, but it was times like these when Chad could almost believe they were in a proper relationship.

As was always the case on the first morning of these trips, Chad's alarm seemed to go off way too soon. He forced himself to turn it off and drag himself out of bed, watching enviously as Ryan buried his face deeper into his pillow. To remove himself from the temptation of the warm bed--and the warm body within it--Chad swiftly showered and dressed, then went to the kitchen in search of breakfast. As always, Ryan had thoughtfully programmed his coffeemaker the night before, so caffeine was waiting at least.

Chad was on the subway before he began to feel like he was waking up, but at least he was capable of thinking of something other than how much he wanted to go back to sleep by the time he had to focus on work. The day dragged on, but eventually he was able to return to Ryan's. They had time to eat dinner together before Ryan had to leave for the theatre, then Chad spent the evening taking advantage of the insane number of channels included in Ryan's cable service. Once Ryan got back, they had a couple of hours before Chad needed to turn in, which they spent partly discussing what had been going on in Ryan's life, and partly making out. Well, mostly making out, but in their defense they'd had a fairly long phone conversation only a few days earlier, so Chad was pretty caught up on Ryan's life already. Between having more or less adjusted to the time change and their activities after moving to the bedroom, Chad found it easier to fall asleep that night, making getting up Friday morning easier as well.

He returned that evening to a more enthusiastic than usual greeting from Ryan.

"What was that for?" he asked once Ryan had pulled back a little.

Ryan beamed at him. "The stage manager called half an hour ago--Matt sprained his ankle and the first understudy is on vacation, so I'm going on as the lead tonight!"

Chad felt himself returning the grin, and tightened his arms around Ryan's waist. "That's awesome! You totally deserve this. It's about time you had a chance to show people what you can do. Is it too late for me to get a ticket, do you think?"

"Already taken care of; just give your name at the box office."

"Awesome," Chad repeated. "Everyone's going to love you, Ry. I'm sure of it."

"I hope you're right. And if I'm _really_ lucky, maybe there will be a casting director or two in the house tonight."

"Start thinking about how you want to celebrate after the show," Chad told him, confident that Ryan would be brilliant.

Ryan laughed. "I will. But now I've got to go--they want me there early to run through a few things, since I haven't actually played the role before. You'll be okay for dinner on your own?"

"You bet. Don't worry about me; you go break a leg or whatever."

Stealing another kiss, Ryan grabbed his bag and rushed out the door. Chad smiled fondly after him before heading to the kitchen in search of the delivery menus.

When he got to the theatre, he found a ticket waiting for him as promised. He took a moment to enjoy the increased prominence of Ryan's name on the evening's cast board before heading into the theatre itself. As he did, he overheard a few people complaining about missing the regular lead, but Chad was certain they'd come around once they'd actually seen what Ryan could do. He snagged an extra Playbill, figuring Ryan would want one with the slip saying he would be doing Matt's role, and settled into his seat. It was much better than he was expecting for the last minute, but the place seemed more or less full, so he guessed ticket sales were doing okay anyway. He hoped so, for Ryan's sake.

The lights dimmed and the show began. As he'd expected, Ryan was brilliant. Not only were his singing and dancing absolutely amazing, his acting was, too. Even though he was predisposed to assume Ryan would be good at anything to do with performing, Chad was a little surprised at how thoroughly convincing he was even with the romance bits. He actually spent two hours believing Ryan was straight, something that he once would have sworn was impossible. (He made a mental note not to mention that later, though, having already sat through Ryan's rant about how it was no different for a straight actor to act like he was in love with a man than with a woman he wasn't attracted to. Presumably he'd feel just as strongly about the reverse scenario, and Chad really didn't want Ryan's ire directed at him.)

Not surprisingly, the audience loved him, judging by the reactions. When Ryan took his curtain call even the other cast members applauded for him, which Chad didn't remember them doing the other times he'd seen the show. Chad couldn't have been prouder if he were the one on that stage.

This time when Ryan emerged from the stage door he was mobbed by people wanting him to sign their programs or pose for pictures. He managed to flash an apologetic smile over a fan's shoulder, but Chad didn't mind waiting. He kind of enjoyed watching his probably-just-friend receiving the kind of attention he deserved, in fact.

Once he was free, Ryan bounded over to where Chad was standing and threw his arms around Chad's neck, laughing giddily.

"You were amazing," Chad told him. "I can't begin to tell you how great you were."

"That's good to hear, because it felt great."

"You were totally meant to be up there, Ry. You made it all look so effortless."

"Thanks."

"Now, about that celebration...?"

"Why don't we just go back to the apartment and celebrate there?" Ryan suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Chad agreed readily. They walked back with their arms around each others' waists, Ryan chattering eagerly about the performance the whole way.

Once they'd arrived, Ryan stopped talking and they took full advantage of the fact that neither of them had to get up early Saturday morning. Chad was still the first to wake--as usual--but he didn't mind so much when he didn't have to go anywhere. To be honest, he rather liked these late Saturday mornings with Ryan, watching him sleep and occasionally even slipping out of bed when he noticed Ryan beginning to stir so he could have breakfast ready by the time Ryan was fully awake. This morning he thought Ryan definitely deserved to be spoiled, so he sacrificed some lying-around time to get dressed and sneak out long enough to run to the store down the block for a bag of chocolate chips to add to the pancakes he often made.

Ordinarily Ryan stuck with blueberries in his pancakes, but he'd admitted his weakness for chocolate several weeks ago, and Chad was a firm believer in being allowed to break a diet for special occasions. Not that Chad still worried too much about what he himself ate--definitely a benefit of having quit sports--but he understood that Ryan needed to and tried not to tempt him under normal circumstances. Today was a good time to make an exception, however.

He put on a pot of coffee to brew while he mixed up the batter. The first batch had just come off the griddle when Ryan walked into the kitchen, hair standing up and eyes still half-closed.

"Mmm, smells good," he mumbled, gratefully taking the mug of coffee Chad held out to him before collapsing into a chair.

"Thanks. Your timing is perfect," Chad added, sliding a full plate in front of Ryan. He poured another batch onto the griddle for himself then turned back to the table while they cooked.

Ryan had found the silverware and managed to cut his pancakes without even fully opening his eyes. Then he lifted a forkful to his mouth, and his eyes flew open. "Chocolate chip?" Chad nodded. "Where did you find those? I didn't think I had any."

"You didn't. I went out about half an hour ago to buy them. I thought you might like a treat the morning after your big break."

"They're amazing, Chad. Thank you." He flashed a sleepy smile before turning his focus to the food.

Chad let him eat in silence while his own pancakes finished cooking, then joined him at the table. "So, how long do you think you'll get to do this lead role thing?"

Ryan hastily swallowed so he could answer. "Well, the first understudy is due back on Tuesday, so probably just this weekend."

"Oh. That's too bad. Will your parents or sister be able to get out here to see you, at least?"

"My parents are out of the country right now, and Shar won't be able to make it, either."

"Sorry, man. That sucks." Chad had absolutely no desire to have Sharpay visit while he was, too, but for Ryan's sake he would have dealt. "Well, I'm glad I was here to see you, at least."

Ryan smiled warmly at him. "So am I."

"So...more pancakes?"

"I'd love some, but I'd better not. As it is I think I've eaten enough for breakfast and lunch."

"Suit yourself." Chad rose to make a few more for himself, while Ryan poured them each a second cup of coffee. "So, I'm thinking I might see the show again tonight. I hear they've got this new guy who's simply incredible."

Ryan blushed, but couldn't help looking pleased. "You don't have to, you know. It means a lot that you sat through it again at all--I know how you feel about musicals, don't forget. I'm not expecting--"

Chad piled the last of the pancakes on his plate and turned off the stove, then returned to the table to stand next to Ryan. He set the plate down and reached out to turn Ryan's face up to meet his. "Hey, Ry, newsflash: you're good. Really, really good. And I like watching you. And okay, yeah, I don't like musicals, generally speaking--but I like seeing yours, because this is what you were born to do. You're so lucky, that you've found that," he added, taking his seat and turning back to his breakfast.

"We'll find something for you," Ryan assured him. "I haven't forgotten. We'll talk about it after I get off work tomorrow."

"Sure. But my point is, watching you up there is miles better than just watching some random musical. And if I want to do it again while I have the chance, I will," Chad concluded, taking a bite at last.

"Huh," Ryan said thoughtfully.

"What?"

"As pep talks go, that was much, much better than 'what team?'" Ryan grinned impishly.

Chad rolled his eyes, but couldn't help grinning back. He did so like having someone in his life who remembered the way he used to be, but didn't expect him to be that person anymore. Troy still hadn't noticed that he'd stopped living for basketball years ago, and he'd pretty much drifted away from his other high school friends. But for the past several months, Ryan had been there to fill that role.

Ryan rose and took care of the breakfast dishes while Chad finished eating, then they showered and dressed. Their Saturday mornings were typically lazy--a late breakfast followed by lying around reading the paper or watching TV until it was time for Ryan to go to work--and this was no exception. They occasionally talked a little about things they saw or read, but for the most part they just enjoyed being together. It was comfortable, and Chad looked forward to this quiet time as much as he did any other part of his visits. Somehow sitting alone in his apartment in Albuquerque, though outwardly only marginally less eventful, simply didn't compare.

Eventually, however, Ryan did have to go to work. It was hard to be disappointed about that today, given how excited he still was about playing the lead, so Chad just kissed him goodbye and told him to break a leg. He puttered around the apartment for a while, then fixed himself a sandwich and settled down to watch some of Ryan's DVDs.

That evening he did go down and see the show again, and it was clear that having done the role twice already hadn't diminished Ryan's enthusiasm one bit. This audience responded just as positively as the one on Friday had, and during curtain calls he could tell Ryan was basking in the approval. Given that he'd spent the first eighteen years of his life overshadowed by Sharpay despite his greater talent, Chad didn't think it surprising that Ryan, despite having a healthy sense of how good he was, was still grateful when other people recognised that fact. A little sad, perhaps, but not surprising.

When Ryan had finished with the people outside the stage door and could greet Chad, he asked if Chad would mind going out with some of the cast members. It was something they'd only done a couple of times since that first visit, so although Chad knew people's names thanks to all those hours on the phone with Ryan, he couldn't really put those names together with faces and never really felt comfortable with them. On the other hand, chances were good that this was intended as a celebration for Ryan, so he figured it was worth feeling like an outsider for a couple of hours.

It was clear when Ryan introduced him to a few people he apparently hadn't met before that they knew who he was; it felt nice, knowing Ryan must have talked about him. As he watched Ryan interact with these people over the course of the evening, Chad realised how much he had changed since high school. He'd always come off as coolly confident, but once they'd gotten to know each other Chad had learned to see behind the façade. In social situations, even among friends, Ryan had often been uncertain, reserved. At times it had felt like all it would take was someone saying one wrong thing to cause him to pull away from them all again. Now, though, he seemed genuinely relaxed, sure of himself. Chad could think of several possible reasons for the change--being among people who knew and cared about the same things Ryan did, having spent years away from Sharpay and her put-downs, even simply not being a teenager anymore--but whatever the cause, he definitely liked the result.

This Ryan was the center of attention not because of the way he dressed or how loud his sister was, but because you couldn't help but watch him. He reminded Chad of a hotter, sparklier version of the Troy Bolton who'd ruled East High once upon a time. He regretted not having been around to observe the transformation, but at least he got to see the final outcome.

Sunday was another late morning for the two of them. Chad debated going to watch Ryan's performance one last time for about ten minutes before he caved, reasoning that it might be months or even years before he had a chance to see him in a proper role again. That wasn't pathetic, was it?

Afterwards, they had dinner at a restaurant Ryan recommended--one of those that New York seemed full of, the sort neither of them could afford to eat at if it weren't for Ryan's parents' money. Aside from letting them pay for his apartment, Ryan didn't usually flaunt his family's wealth, which somehow made it easier for Chad to go along when he wanted to do things like this. And, he had to admit, the food was pretty damn good, though perhaps not worth what they were being charged.

When they returned to the apartment at last, Ryan insisted Chad relax while he made coffee. Returning to the living room, he handed Chad a mug and settled next to him on the couch.

"Sorry I sort of hijacked the weekend so far," he began. "But we've got nearly a full day left, and now we're going to focus on you. Any more thoughts on the job situation?"

"Nothing useful," Chad admitted. "I know I'd like to get back out of New Mexico, but that's about it. I don't want to just transfer to another office, though, since I'd still be stuck doing the same boring work. The problem is, I have no idea what to do instead."

"Hmm. Okay, well, you mentioned before that you don't like sitting behind a desk all day, which pretty much rules out office-type jobs in general."

"I guess it does."

"To be honest, I'm not surprised you need something that lets you be more active, especially since you're not regularly playing sports anymore. In high school you could never sit stil for longer than thirty seconds or so."

Chad laughed. "I never really thought about it, but you're right. Still, ruling out a whole category of jobs doesn't exactly get me any closer to knowing what I do want to do."

"Good point. Let me think."

They fell silent for a while. Chad had learned that Ryan often had trouble thinking about one thing while discussing something else, even if the topics were related; he wasn't really inclined to thinking something through as he talked about it, either. Sometimes it was best to let him have a few minutes of quiet so he could focus. Chad was happy to give him that time.

"It seems to me," Ryan said eventually, "that if you didn't have to worry about paying rent, you could take some time to really figure out what you want to do with your life. I mean, other living expenses tend to be pretty manageable--it's not like you have my sister's spending habits."

"Sure, but I'm a little old to live with my parents."

"I was thinking that you could move here, actually."

"To New York?" Ryan gave him that maddeningly patient look he used to get when Chad had trouble learning a dance move. "Or...here?"

"Why not? The apartment's paid for, food for an extra person really wouldn't add all that much. You could do some volunteering to help you decide what you'd like to do, and not have to worry about finding a job right away."

"And your parents? How would they feel about basically supporting a near stranger?"

"They'd be fine with this, Chad. The rent's the same whether one person lives here or two. If you wanted to kick in for other expenses, you could probably get a part-time job and still have time to do what you need to do. Besides, it'd only be temporary."

"What if I never think of anything?"

Ryan shrugged. "I get access to my trust fund in a few years, and I have absolutely no problem with using it to support us both."

Chad blinked. "Why am I not as surprised as I should be that you have a trust fund?"

Ryan grinned at him. "Because you've met my parents and know they're not as lacking in sense as they often appear, so of course they'd take steps to ensure their children were provided for, since they have the means. It's not a particularly large amount, by trust fund standards, but there's certainly enough there to live on for quite some time if we're sensible."

It was Chad's turn to fall silent as he thought. "I...don't know what to say."

"There's no need to decide right away," Ryan pointed out. "Why don't you take whatever time you need to think about it; the offer's not going anywhere."

Later that night, Chad lay awake long after Ryan had fallen asleep beside him. Perhaps the last thing he'd expected was for Ryan to suggest he move in with him, though it did answer the question of how Ryan thought of them. Living together was a big deal, however, and Chad wasn't sure if it was a step he wanted to take.

Actually, that was a lie. The way he'd felt in that moment when he'd first understood what Ryan was asking made what he wanted very clear. What he didn't know was whether it was a good idea. If you considered only the time they'd spent in the same city, he and Ryan had barely been together a month. Chad had never lived with a guy before--never even considered it, to be honest--but surely doing so after a month was moving too fast. Right?

Surprisingly, when he thought about it Chad didn't have a problem with the idea of letting Ryan support him, at least temporarily. He wasn't quite comfortable with having his parents do the same, though he had to concede that Ryan was probably right about their not minding. His parents on the other hand.... They'd accepted him being gay readily enough, but this might be too much for them. Not only were they too proud to be happy about having someone else's parents take care of their son, they were traditional enough to think that letting someone--anyone--support him would make Chad less of a man in a way that sleeping with men somehow didn't.

If it were someone else, that might have made Chad uncomfortable, too. But he knew Ryan's offer was intended to provide non-financial help, not as an implication that Chad was unwilling or unable to earn a living on his own. It was just that Ryan, though more subtle about it than his sister, tended to think most problems could be solved by throwing money at them in one way or another. His parents, not knowing Ryan nearly as well as he did, would never understand that.

Then again, he couldn't spend his life making decisions based on what his parents would think.

Ryan rolled over in his sleep, throwing one arm over Chad and snuggling close. Chad suddenly had a hard time remembering why this might be a bad idea.

The next morning they both took advantage of the fact neither had anywhere to go to lie in bed even later than they usually did on weekends. Chad enjoyed the chance to watch the drawn-out process that was Ryan waking up naturally, with no outside pressure to speed things along. It seemed to involve several repetitions of half-opening his eyes, groaning, and burying his head in the pillow again. Chad reckoned Ryan was technically awake for nearly an hour before he managed to open his eyes and keep them that way.

Ryan's smile when he did was worth the wait, however.

"I like waking up to find you here," Ryan told him in lieu of a greeting.

"So do I." Chad returned the smile fondly. "Want me to go start breakfast?"

"Mmm, don't think so," Ryan decided, stretching his whole body, like a large cat. "I think I'd rather stay in bed a while longer, since we can."

Chad's brow furrowed as he remembered something. "Wait--don't you go to dance classes on Mondays?"

"Usually, yeah. It's not going to kill me to skip one day, though, and this is a special occasion."

"How so?"

Ryan rolled on top of him, punctuating his reply with kisses. "You. Here. All day."

When he put it like that, Chad wasn't about to argue.

Sometime later they finally left the bed and threw together a quick lunch. As they ate, Chad couldn't help returning to the subject of the previous evening.

"You don't think it's too soon?" he asked without preamble.

Ryan looked confused for a moment, then his expression cleared. "We've been together for over six months, Chad, and we've known each other for years."

"But for most of those six months we were 2,000 miles apart...."

"Doesn't matter. Do you have any idea how many hours we've spent on the phone? I'd say that makes up for the physical distance, at least in terms of how long we've been together. Would I have suggested this now if you weren't already talking about leaving Albuquerque? Probably not. But that doesn't mean it's a bad idea."

Chad wasn't entirely convinced, though he certainly wanted to be. He did appreciate that Ryan didn't pressure him into making a decision, instead changing the subject when it became clear Chad had no reply.

As he half-listened to Ryan's eager description of the Tony Award ceremony the following weekend--one of the show's nominations was for choreography, so according to Ryan the producers had decided to showcase it by using one of the ensemble dance numbers as their excerpt to be performed during the awards, and Ryan was looking forward to doing his thing on national TV--Chad reflected on how nice this was. They didn't often have hours in which to just hang out without being aware of the clock; usually one or the other of them had somewhere they needed to be. If he lived here, they could take time like this more often, at least until he started working again.

It was definitely something to take into consideration.

Consider it he did as the afternoon wore on. When the time came for him to pack and head to the airport, he couldn't help thinking that it could be the last time he had to say goodbye like this. The idea was certainly an attractive one.

In the end, what cemented his decision was the dread he felt upon arriving at the office the following morning. All of a sudden he hated the mere thought of spending one more day behind that desk. Ryan was offering him a way out, one that wasn't dependent on figuring out what he wanted to do with his life and finding a new job. Getting to spend more time with Ryan was just a bonus. In that moment, all the questions that had kept him awake Sunday night seemed irrelevant.

That evening as he waited for it to be late enough to call Ryan, Chad worried that he might be tempted to accept the offer for the wrong reasons, simply to get out. But he had basically made up his mind before that had occurred to him, which surely meant he wouldn't really be taking advantage of Ryan...right?

This was ridiculous. Moving to the other side of the country was a big decision, yes, but he couldn't keep flip-flopping like this. It wasn't getting him anywhere, and Ryan deserved an answer. Every time he started thinking about it too much he ended up second-guessing himself and coming up with excuses not to do it. When he let himself focus on what he wanted, on the other hand, the answer was clear. Why did he keep trying to talk himself out of it? Hadn't he learned better than to let other people's expectations and opinions define his life?

How sad to think that he'd been smarter at twenty than he was now.

By the time Ryan was probably home, he'd made up his mind.

"Hi, Chad," Ryan answered cheerfully. "What's up?"

"Question for you, Ry."

"Shoot."

"How does a month sound?"

"You mean...?"

"I'll need to give notice at work and to my landlord, not to mention time to pack, but...yeah."

"Fantastic! Let me know if you want to keep anything large, like furniture, and I'll try to make room. I'll also start going through the closet and dresser," Ryan added with a laugh.

"Well, I'm not attached to my furniture, and your electronics are way better than mine, so I'll probably just get rid of all the large stuff. Making room in your closet might be a problem, though."

"We'll figure something out." Ryan paused, then continued more seriously, "I'm so glad you said yes. I'm looking forward to this already."

Warmth filled Chad at that statement, and he smiled fondly. "So am I."


End file.
